Johnnie Walker, the DJ fined ? 2,000 last week for possessing cocaine, was suitably contrite as Radio 2 opened its arms to welcome him back to work. "I'm extremely sorry for all the embarrassment I've caused my family, friends and the BBC," he said.
Embarrassment? My dear old chap, this is absolutely the best thing to have happened to Radio 2's image in years.
There has only been one other significant drags scandal involving a Radio 2 presenter. One day in 1993, Alan Freeman accidentally took an overdose of his arthritis pills. Luckily, there was no lasting damage done to Freeman, but for Radio 2 it was touch and go.
Arthritis pills? This was not the image that the station had been assiduously nurturing. For years, Radio 2 has been struggling to cast off the impression that it thinks hip is something that you can have replaced on the NHS at some point in your late seventies.
This struggle has not been a success. To many listeners, it is the station to which people turn when they start taking an interest in golf, Sanatogen and comfortable cardigans.
It is a reliable friend to lean on when you hear yourself say: "Radio 4 is all very well, but why does everything have to be so brash and loud?".
So for Radio 2 to have a chap on the staff who's had a brush with cocaine and wild living was a lucky bonus. For a short time, Radio 2 producers could turn up at nightclub doors without being sniggered at. (S.T.)
ASSIGNMENTS FOR SELF-CONTROL | ASSIGNMENTS FOR SELF-CONTROL | ASSIGNMENTS FOR SELF-CONTROL | ASSIGNMENTS FOR SELF-CONTROL | ASSIGNMENTS FOR SELF-CONTROL | ASSIGNMENTS FOR SELF-CONTROL | ASSIGNMENTS FOR SELF-CONTROL | CHAPTER IV. TYPES OF NARRATION | CHAPTER V. FUNCTIONAL STYLES | REVEALED: BRITAIN'S SECRET NUCLEAR PLANT |